This week, from the world of labcoats, forceps and retort:-
- A submarine probing life at the bottom of the ocean was subjected to a brutal attack by an octopus. Scientists attribute it to ageing:-
"Old octopuses become what we call senescent, or senile... and sometimes their actions are very inappropriate."
Jim Cosgrove, Royal British Columbia Museum
- The London Planetarium will now present the kind of stars folk really wanna see, and not some obscure objects in the nightsky that a bunch of crazy astronomers get obsessed about.
"Please note that from now on, Orion's Belt will be replaced by Chantelle's Thong."
- Leah Whigham of the University of Wisconsin, Madison, now reports that its a virus, and not Fritolays that causes obesity. Of course, that's true only for chickens, not humans.
"You cannot ethically... infect humans and see if they get fat.", she says.
- Nature reports that Russia's state-owned space company says that the nation plans to establish a Moon base and mine lunar helium-3 as a fuel for fusion reactors.
That's not ageing. Believe me, that's an anti-American Octopusic Fundamentalist opposed to Freedom and Democracy.
Do we get to see the Paris Hilton video there?
What did we get Guantanamo Bay rigged up for, then?
Sources: CBC, The Guardian, The Telegraph
So like, you're getting genuine moonlight when you switch a bulb in Russia! And for a fact, the moon gives off reflected sunlight, so Russian moonlight's actually better than the real thing!
Nature, 9 February, 2006