Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

My humble attempts at an Indian answer:-

JAYALALITHA: To fall at my feet; I was standing on the other side.

A RAJA: I was dishing out licenses on first-come-first-serve basis on the other side of the road.

KARUNANIDHI: It was in a hurry to attend my umpteenth felicitation function.

M K AZHAGIRI: Adhai Tamizhakki sollavum, purindhukondu badhil solven (Please translate into Tamil, I will understand and reply).

M K STALIN: In Singara Chennai, who doesn't want to cross the shining city roads again and again?

RAMGOPAL VERMA: Because I was making a film on this side of the road.

RAJ THACKERAY: Because this side of the road is reserved for Marathi chickens only. This chicken was non-Marathi.

VATAL NAGARAJ: Because this side of the road is reserved for Kannadiga chickens only. This chicken was non-Kannadiga.

BAL THACKERAY: This chicken was a traitor who crossed over to Manse and betrayed the Marathi cause.

ASHOK CHAVAN: Obvious. I was throwing a party in my Adarsh society flat.

VILASRAO DESHMUKH: We caqnnot have a non-Maratha crossing the road, isn't it?

NARENDRA MODI: It wanted to be part of the 5.5 crore Vibrant Gujarati chickens.

L K ADVANI: It got pissed off that I called its kinsman 'nikamma'.

UMA BHARATI: Every chicken has a right to Bijli, Pani, Sadak, Ram and Roti.

VENKAIAH NAIDU: Because the chicken follows our danda, jhanda and agenda.

PRAKASH KARAT: It was a betrayal of our independent foreign policy to American interests.

BABA RAMDEV: It did not cross the road; it was doing Sadakparasana.

ATAL BIHARI VAJPAYEE: The chicken crossed....the road....because....yeh....achhi baat....nahin hai....

SITARAM YECHURY: It wanted to escape to a proletarian paradise from an imperial capitalistic fascistic enterprise.

KISHENJI: We'll let go of the chicken if you make the CRPF go back to barracks.

CIVIL SOCIETY ACTIVISTS: To free Dr. Binayak Sen, to appoint Kiran Bedi as CIC, to give Aamir Khan's films publicity...

ANNA HAZARE: To go on a fast to get the JAN Chickenpal Bill passed.

MEDHA PATKAR: Did the chicken cross the road? What atrocity! We must go on a protest dharna immediately.

ARUNDHATI ROY: No one-liners please. I will write a long, controversial essay which will be published in Outlook and New York Times and shame the government in Western media.

AJIT SINGH: Can I defect to the chicken's party if I can get to be a minister?

MANMOHAN SINGH: The chicken thinks it is its birthright to cross the road.

RAHUL GANDHI: I shall go and stay in the chicken's coop as a mark of solidarity with all road-crossing chickens.

SONIA GANDHI: The cheeken kross tha road beecose Kongrese ka haath aamo chickene ke saath. (Translated from Hintalian: The chicken crossed the road because Congress ka saath, aam chicken ka saath)

MAMATA BANERJEE: I announce free rail passes for all road-crossing female chickens.

SHASHI THAROOR: The chicken wanted an upgrade from chicken-class to cattle-class.


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